I Wish I Had a Conspiracy Theory

Then everything in my world would make sense,

the Bernie bros and the friends of Mike Pence.

AOC, Ivanka Trump, and Cardi B

would fit into one # hashtag mystery,

The Q-Anon boys would have a spot

in my dysfunctional Camelot.

The Antifa guys would have their place.

I would understand Outer Space!

Bitcoin carnivores, vegans in pleather,  

 RINO and Soros, even Big Pharma–

 in my delusional drama, we’d be

 one Big Bird of a paranoid feather.